This post is about overcoming mental blocks and getting rid of limiting beliefs, which may be hampering your progress to success.
Especially, if you find yourself using victim language like “I can’t”, “I will try”, “I will do my best”, or rationalizations and excuses like “It’s too hard”, “I don’t have the time”, “I am too old”, read on…
Reason number 1 for your blockage – Destructive criticism
Destructive criticism, especially the one early in your childhood is devastating.It’s like a neutron bomb. It leaves the body intact, destroying the person inside completely. It destroys the feelings of its target completely.
Children take anything said by an Authority – an adult, a doctor, a teacher as absolute truth. So, if you tell them “you suck”, they will believe it.
So, step #1 toward overcoming mental blocks is simple… Realize that the destructive criticism that was given to you as a child isn’t correct at all and move on.
Step #2 is as Robin Sharma says bellow… Silence your critics and don’t allow anymore destructive criticism.
Silence your critics. Ignore your haters. Delete your cynics.
Reason number 2 – Lack of love
They treat kids as pets…
If you don’t spend enough time with your child, it gets the feeling it’s no good.
The truth is that no child asked to be born. Once you make it, you are responsible.
A child should be in the company of someone who is crazy about them for the first 3 – 5 years.
For children to feel fully loved, three conditions should be met.
- Parents must love themselves
- Parents must love each other
- Parents must love the child
The only way to love the child is to spend high quantities of time with it.
low self-esteem parents raise low self-esteem children.
Children learn about love by watching it between their parents.
50% of first marriages usually end up in a divorce. The second marriage usually takes off.
Spend an enormous amount of time with the child. Talk and listen and do things together. Do movies, walks in the park, ask questions…
A relationship grows stronger the more time you spend together. Any relationship… Customer relationship, business relationship, romantic…
Quality time is a function of the quantity of time. You can’t excuse yourself with “I am spending little time with my child, but it’s of high quality, so it’s OK”. Leave the music in your car off when you travel with someone. The silence will quickly fill with a conversation.
You can’t catch up on years you have missed with your children.
Reason number 3 – a feeling of guilt
Another popular reason for mental blocks is a feeling of unworthiness. Again, the reason for this is destructive criticism.
People who have been raised with destructive criticism and lack of love experience self-hatred and self-doubt. “I am not good enough”. You feel guilty for being successful. You have an uneasy feeling that everything you have earned will be taken away from you.
Guilt is used for two reasons:
Negative forms of parenting are based on putting a sense of guilt in the child the first six years, or you will never get them. Negative parenting is based on beating the emotional crap out of the child.
Adult manifestations of guilt: feelings of inferiority, inadequacy, undeservingness. Destructive self-criticism.
The feeling of undeservingness lies at the base of all negative emotions. It’s not fear of success. It’s a feeling of undeservingness. The truth is, that if you earn your money through service, you deserve it. Deserve means “Do your service”.
Destructive self-criticism keeps the plate of the parent running as an adult.
People who are victims of destructive criticism are:
- Easily manipulated by guilt
- Use guilt and blame on others
- Use victim language
- I can’t
- I have to
- I am trying
- I will do my best
- I will try
To rid yourself of guilt
- Eliminate destructive self-criticism
- Refuse to be manipulated by guilt
- Refuse to use guilt and blame
- Use the law of forgiveness. Basically, forgive yourself, your parents, your enemies, your friends, your bullies, and the world.
Never say anything about yourself that you don’t sincerely desire to be true. Don’t say bad things for yourself. You have friends and family to do that for you.
When people try to use guilt on you, ask them “are you trying to make me feel guilty”. Keep saying it, until the person giving you a guilt trip gives up.
Never bring up past mistakes. You are mentally healthy to a degree to which you can forgive the worst grievances against you.
- Your parents
- Everyone else
Be careful with what you say to your children.
Let go of Anger
Do you know that the other person would be happy to know that you are still upset about what they have done to you?
Superior people have no anger.
To repent means to be done with a past event.
Remember, that what you dwell upon grows.
This is a letter of forgiveness. It has incredible releasing power.
First, you start the letter with words
“I forgive you everything”
Then you continue with a detailed list of grievances your forgive.
- Grievance 1
- Grievance 2
- Grievance 3
Then you end up the letter with the words “I wish you well” and you sign it and mail it.
Now you are free.
How do you manage your mental blocks? Do you meditate to let go of anger? Let us know in the comments bellow.